Why Is It So Hard?

Why is it so hard to say goodbye at the end of the night? Why is it so hard to get into that car and drive away from you? Why do I want to cry when I look into your eyes, and see how much it breaks your heart to see me go. I only ever want to see you smile, and seeing that look in your eyes makes it so hard to just walk away. It tears me up so much inside to see it, even though I love nothing more than to look into your eyes.

I feel so terrifyingly intertwined with you. I realized as I drove home, how clear the sky was, how beautiful the stars were. I realized that I hadn't even noticed them. For one of the first times in my life I did not look for the stars in the midnight sky. I saw them in your eyes.

I am so lost in you now, I sometimes wonder how I walked this world without your love. Then I think of all the people who were there for me, who have helped me to get here, shaped and molded me. In so many ways it was my friends, my family, even those who hurt me, that made me ready for this moment. All those people helped to create me, helped me to find myself, even though I thought I was lost somewhere in there.

I've cried more in the last year then I think I have in my entire life. The fact of the matter is though, that these tears needed to be let go of, I suppose. I needed these tears, and the people who helped me to get through them. You, especially, have let me cry in recent months. I still do not know what I would do if I lost you now, even though I know that I won't.

And then the world just fades away

and nothing else matters

except the look in your eyes

except the stars in your eyes

when you look my way

as the music continues to play

and i see it all in your eyes

the world just doesn't exist

and it's that perfect moment

where the lights fade to black

and all that fills my view

is your eyes

your face.

all i can think about

is how my hand fits in yours

how i love so much it hurts

and how everything seems so right

and then the world just fades away.

everything freezes in time

my heart beat seems so loud,

and i wonder if you feel it too

if maybe i'm just imagining it

but then i see it in your eyes

the way i see the stars in the sky

and know that they are real

know that you

and this

and us

that we and all these things

are real.

the world is still fading away

and i'm standing here with you

in this dream that i'll recall

only when i wake up

standing in this frozen moment

with my heart beat in my ears

and my heart in my throat

and these words on my lips

and these tears in my eyes

and these perfect moments

where the world just fades away