Returning to Myself

Tonight it is gorgeous outside my house. The clouds are full and heavy and dark, but not so dark and thick that I can't see the moon shining through. I can see it illuminate the night sky and cast beautiful shadows across the clouds and stars. The light reaches out like the fingertips of some distant Goddess, trying to reach down from heaven to touch the earth and bate it in the purity She offers.

I stood outside and I gave thanks tonight. I stood and raised my arms to the moon and the stars and the sky and the trees and the Air and the Earth. I sang of Fire and I smelled Water on the breeze. I listened for the sounds of the night and I sang a wordless song that I didn't understand.

I communed and felt better for it. I let go.

That is the hardest part in life, learning to just let it go.

Here I am, and I am beautiful, I am full, I am creation and destruction. I am the beginning and the end.

In me there is wisdom, but it is hidden.

In me there is truth, but it cannot be known.

In this world there is love, but first it must be found.

Love abounds, but we must let it into ourselves first.

First we must find it within us to swallow the moon, to take life as it is, to find joy in the simplicity of simply living with who we are.

I love my friends. They are my life sometimes. Some of them more so than others.

Some of them are the sisters of my heart and shall always be the people I feel closest to.

I gave thanks for them tonight. I gave thanks for their beauty and their light.

I gave thanks because I know what love is and I know what life is and I know what forgiveness is.

I gave thanks because I am able to let go and to live and to love and continue with life and live with myself.

Maybe I'll do so again tomorrow night, because it was a good feeling and something I haven't done in a long time.

It's something that I have missed.

I love the smell of grass, the way it feels on my skin.

I love the smell of fall, of life finishing its cycle and the knowledge that soon the slate will be wiped clean and life will begin again.

I am life. I am alive.

I am.

I am.

I am.