Me, Myself, and I

 

I can't help but feel lonely in the dark hours of the night, when not so long ago, those long hours would have been spent in conversation with people I love. I could have spent those hours talking to friends, and family. I could have spent those hours in quiet merriment, or rolling laughter.

I don't mind being alone. In some ways I prefer my own company, but one gets used to being with other people. I got used to having some one to spill my heart out to, some one to whom I could vent everything that was on my mind and not feel completely and foolishly self-conscious. I miss my best friends. I miss the comfort that they gave, and the love and support that they poured out to me. I miss being able to be there to listen to them as well. I miss hearing their voices, giving them hugs, helping them through life as they helped me. It's just not the same when it's not in person.

I can't explain what it is that I'm feeling, because I'm completely happy where I am. Things are going well for me, progressing in exactly the manner that I want them to, and yet... it's inexplicable. Every now and then there is something that makes me feel just a little bit more alone than I know I really am. I feel like my friends and I have been scattered to the four winds, all going seperate directions, and yet there is still something that holds us together. We've shared a large part of our lives and our selves with one another. I think that is the best gift that they have ever given me.